by Chris Alexion, Copyright March 26, 2006, all rights reserved. 322 views
Jack Bauer does not agree with patriarchy, which he feels does not go far enough. Jack Bauer believes in monarchy. Jack is king.
According to Jack Bauer, those who approach his daughter Kimberly are to be considered possible terrorists. Jack maintains a WET list of these young men. This explains why Kim is not married.
CTU does not stand for the Counter-Terrorist Unit. It means the Courtship Terror Unit.
Jack Bauer believes in a hands-off courtship. His advice to couples is "Let me see your hands! Interlock your fingers behind your head!"
Jack Bauer thinks patriarchs who quiz young men with long lists of questions are wusses. Jack prefers intimidation, interrogation drugs administered by I.V., and possibly kneecapping.
Jack Bauer does not believe in chaperones, but he will often track the couple with field agents, satellite imagery, and parabolic microphones.
Jack Bauer does not approve of boy-girl gifts until after the engagement. Jack has been known to wait in the bushes by the front door, emerge with gun, and shout, "Drop the flowers NOW!"
Jack Bauer does not like extensive boy-girl conversations. He will send Curtis Manning's tac teams to break these up if necessary.
Jack Bauer is not afraid to comment on a young man's parentage.
If you think you were treated too harshly by Jack Bauer, do not complain to your session. Jack Bauer does not work for your session.
1 • LHR • March 26, 2006 • 6:48 PM
So here it is, Jack Bauer on courtship…I was not at all disappointed! As usual, it was really good - very funny. ./chrisalexion_2008-10_wordpress_export_files/icon_smile.gif alt=:- class=wp-smiley It appears that the "24″ show has inspired some very thought provoking posts, as well as a number of entertaining ones. ./chrisalexion_2008-10_wordpress_export_files/icon_smile.gif alt=:- class=wp-smiley
2 • Shawn • March 27, 2006 • 4:53 PM
Look, I've never seen 24 either but the funny part is that some fathers actually resemble some of Jack Bauer's characteristics. It's a classic argumentum ad absurdum for cookie-cutter courtships that don't take the relationship into account apart from the rules. Sweet!
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